Bird Jokes
Bird Joke #1
A couple of pigeons made a date to meet on the ledge outside the tenth floor of a skyscraper. The female was there on time, but the male arrived an hour late. “Where were you? I was worried sick.”
“It was such nice day, I decided to walk.”
Bird Joke #2
A man with a talking parrot is getting married. On the day of the wedding he says to the parrot “Now look here, I know you are always sat in that window sticking your beak in, when me and my new wife get back from the wedding I want you to turn round and and [...]
Bird Joke #3
Chicken to turkey: “Only Thanksgiving and Christmas???
You’re lucky, with us it’s any Sunday.”
Bird Joke #4
David received a parrot for his birthday. This parrot was fully grown with a bad attitude and terrible vocabulary.
Every other word was an expletive. Those that weren’t expletives were, to say the least, rude. David tried hard to change the bird’s attitude. He was constantly saying polite words and playing soft music, he did anything [...]
Bird Joke #5
Did you hear about the chicken that wanted to take ballet lessons?
“He wanted to be a hentertainer.”
Bird Joke #6
How can you tell if a parrot is intelligent?
It speaks in Polly-syllables!
Bird Joke #7
How do you get a parrot to talk properly ?
Send him to polytechnic !
Bird Joke #8
How do you make a tame duck wild? Annoy it.
Bird Joke #9
How do you stop a rooser crowing on Sunday ?
Eat him on Saturday !
Bird Joke #10
How long do chickens work ? Around the cluck !
Bird Joke #11
How many ducks would there be, if you saw two ducks in front of two ducks, two ducks between two ducks, and two ducks behind two ducks?
Answer: 4 ducks-because they are in a row.
Bird Joke #12
Is chicken soup good for your health ?
Not if you’re the chicken !
Bird Joke #13
Look at that speed! said one hawk to another as the jet fighter plane hurtled over their heads.
“Hmph!” snorted the other. “You would fly fast too if your tail was on fire!”
Bird Joke #14
My parrot lays square eggs but can only say one word. What’s that? Ouch!
Bird Joke #15
Q: What is a crowbar?
A: A place were crows go to get a drink!
Bird Joke #16
Q: Why did the chicken say, “Meow, oink, bow-wow, and moo?” A: He was studying foreign languages.
Bird Joke #17
Q: Why did the turkey cross the road?
A: To prove he wasn’t chicken.
Bird Joke #18
Q: Why do hens lay eggs?
A: If they dropped them, they’d break
Bird Joke #19
Teacher: What’s a robin? Fred: A bird that steals, ma’am.
Bird Joke #20
Teacher: What’s the definition of a Polygamist?
Pupil: A parrot with more than one wife!
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