Cowboy Jokes

Cowboy Joke #1

A cowboy and a biker are on death row, and are to be executed on the same day. The day comes, and they are brought to the gas chamber. The warden asks the cowboy if he has a last request, to which the cowboy replies, “Ah shore do, wardn. Ah’d be mighty grateful if’n yoo’d [...]

Cowboy Joke #2

A police officer saw a man dressed as a cowboy in the street, complete with huge stetson hat, spurs, and six shooters.
“Excuse me, sir,” said the police officer, “who are you?”
“My name’s Tex, officer,” said the cowboy.
” eh?” said the police officer, “Are you from Texas?” “Nope, Louisiana.” “Louisiana? So why are you called Tex?” [...]

Cowboy Joke #3

Back in the Old West three Texas cowboys were about to be hung for cattle rustling. The lynch mob brought the three men to a tree right at the edge of the Rio Grande. The idea was that when each man had died, they’d cut the rope and he’d drop into the river and drift [...]

Cowboy Joke #4

Cowboy Joe was telling his fellow cowboys back on the ranch about his first visit to a big-city church. “When I got there, they had me park my old truck in the corral,” Joe began. “You mean the parking lot,” interrupted Charlie, a more worldly fellow. “I walked up the trail to the door,” Joe [...]

Cowboy Joke #5

If a cowboy rides into town on Friday and three days later leaves on Friday, how does he do it? The horse’s name is Friday!

Cowboy Joke #6

Q: Why can’t the bankrupt cowboy complain?
A: He has got no beef.

Cowboy Joke #7

Q: Why did the bowlegged cowboy get fired?
A: Because he couldn’t keep his calves together!

Cowboy Joke #8

Swint and Fess, two Oklahoma cowboys, were resting their horses out on the range.
“What’d Emmaline give yew for yore birthday?” asked Swint.
“Pair of cufflinks,” said Fess. “But I ain’t got no use for them. I can’t even find anyplace to get my wrists pierced.”

Cowboy Joke #9

Teacher: When do astronauts eat?
Pupil: At launch time!

Cowboy Joke #10

The cowboy lay sprawled across three entire seats in the posh Amarillo theatre. When the usher came by and noticed this he whispered to the cowboy, “Sorry, sir, but you’re only allowed one seat.” The cowboy groaned but didn’t budge. The usher became more impatient. “Sir, if you don’t get up from there, I’m going [...]

Cowboy Joke #11

The cowboy was trying to buy a health insurance policy. The insurance agent was going down the list of standard questions.
“Ever have an accident?”
“Nope, nary a one.”
“None? You’ve never had any accidents.”
“Nope. Ain’t never had one. Never.”
“Well, you said on this form you were bit by a snake once. Wouldn’t you consider that an accident?”
“Heck, [...]

Cowboy Joke #12

The eastern lady who was all ready to take a horseback ride said to the cowboy, “Can you get me a nice gentle pony?” “Shore,” said the cowboy. “What kind of a saddle do you want, English or western?” “What’s the difference?” asked the lady. “The western saddle has a horn on it,” said the [...]

Cowboy Joke #13

The swing doors of the Wild West saloon crashed open and in came Little Pete, black with fury. “All right!” he raged, “all right! Who did it? What goldarned varmint painted my horse blue?” The huge figure of Black Jake, notorious gunfighter and town baddie rose from a chair by the door. “It was me, [...]

Cowboy Joke #14

Three cowboys of the world are sitting around camp talking about how tough they were and the tales kept getting bigger and bigger. The cowboy from Australia says, “I wrestled a 200 pound crocodile and may it cry like a baby.”
The Cowboy from Brazil shakes his head and says, “I killed a 400 pound steer [...]

Cowboy Joke #15

Three cowboys were hanging out in the bunkhouse. “I know that smart aleck Tex,” said the first. “He’s going to start bragging about that new foreign car he bought as soon as he gets back.”
“Not Tex,” the second cowboy replied. “He’ll always be just a good ol’ boy. When he walks in, I’m sure all [...]