Dentist Jokes

Dentist Joke #1

A dentist, after completing work on a patient, came to him begging.
Dentist: Could you help me? Could you give out a few of your loudest, most painful screams?
Patient: Why? Docor, it wasn’t all that bad this time.
Dentist: There are so many people in the waiting room right now, and I don’t want to miss the [...]

Dentist Joke #2

A husband and wife entered the dentist’s office. The husband said, “I want a tooth pulled. I don’t want gas or Novocain because I’m in a terrible hurry. Just pull the tooth as quickly as possible.”
“You’re a brave man,” said the dentist. “Now, show me which tooth it is.”
The husband turns to his wife and [...]

Dentist Joke #3

A man went to his dentist because he feels something wrong in his mouth.
The dentist examines him and says, “that new upper plate I put in for you six months ago is eroding. What have you been eating?”
The man replies, “all I can think of is that about four months ago my wife made some [...]

Dentist Joke #4

A patient came to his dentist with problems with his teeth.
Patient: Doctor, I have yellow teeth, what do I do?
Dentist: Wear a brown tie!

Dentist Joke #5

Anyone know the six most frightening words in the world ??? “The Dentist will see you now.”

Dentist Joke #6

As the judge said to the dentist: Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth, and nothing but the tooth?

Dentist Joke #7

At what time do most people go to the dentist?
At tooth-hurty (2:30).

Dentist Joke #8

Cloyd went to a Charleston dentist complaining his gums had shriveled up and his teeth were falling out.
After examining him, the dentist said, “Your mouth is really bad. Do you brush?”
“Ah sure do!” replied Cloyd. “Everee single day!”
“What do you brush with?” asked the dentist,
“Preparation H,” said the redneck.

Dentist Joke #9

Dentist begging the patient: Could you help me? Could you give out a few of your loudest, most painful screams?
Patient: Why? Doc, it isn’t all that bad this time.
Dentist: There are so many people in the waiting room right now and I don’t want to miss the 4 o’clock ball game.

Dentist Joke #10

Dentist: “You don’t need to open your mouth any wider. When I pull your tooth I expect to stand outside.”


Dentist Joke #11

Dentist: Don’t worry. I’m painless.
Patient: I’m not.

Dentist Joke #12

Dentist: I have to pull the aching tooth, but don’t worry it will take just five minutes.
Patient: And how much will it cost?
Dentist: It’s $90.00. Patient: $90.00 for just a few minutes work???
Dentist: I can extract it very slowly if you like.

Dentist Joke #13

Did you get your money? ask the wife of the dentist who had just return from the delinquent patient’s home.
“Not a cent,” growled the dentist, “and worse than that, he insulted me, and gnashed my teeth at me!”

Dentist Joke #14

Did you hear about the dentist who planted a garden?…
A month later he was picking his teeth

Dentist Joke #15

Father: Don’t you feel better now that you’ve gone to the dentist?
Son: Sure do. He wasn’t in.

Dentist Joke #16

Fred’s mother was on the telephone to the boy’s dentist. “I don’t understand it,” she complained, “I thought his treatment would only cost me $20, but you’ve charged me $80.” “It is usually $20, ma’am,” agreed the dentist, “but Fred yelled so loudly that three of my other patients ran away!”

Dentist Joke #17

How many dentists does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to administer the anaesthetic, one to extract the light bulb, and one to offer the socket some vile pink mouthwash.

Dentist Joke #18

I am sorry, madam, but I shall have to charge you hundred dollars for pulling your boy’s tooth.
“Hundred dollars! Why, I understood you to say that you charged only twenty dollars for such work!”
“Yes,” replied the dentist, “but this youngster yelled so terribly that he scared out four other patients out of the office.”

Dentist Joke #19

I came in to make an appointment with the dentist. said the man to the receptionist.
“I’m sorry sir.” she replied. “He’s out right now, but…”
“Thank you,” interrupted the obviously nervous prospective patient. “When will he be out again ?”

Dentist Joke #20

I thought, Miss Smith, that you wanted yesterday afternoon off because you were seeing your dentist?
That’s right, Sir.
So how come I saw you coming out of the movie theatre with a friend? That was my dentist.

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