Ghost Jokes

Ghost Joke #1

A butler came running into his important master’s office. “Sir, sir, there’s a ghost in the corridor. What shall I do with him?” Without looking up from his work the master said, “Tell him I can’t see him.”

Ghost Joke #2

A man was staying in a big old house and in the middle of the night he met a ghost. The ghost said, “I have been walking these corridors for 300 years.” The man said, “in that case, can you tell me the way to the toilet?”

Ghost Joke #3

Did you hear about the ghost comedian? He was booed off stage.

Ghost Joke #4

Did you hear about the ghost who enjoyed doing housework? He used to go round with the oooo-ver.

Ghost Joke #5

Did you hear about the ghost who learnt to fly? He was pleased to be back on terror-firma.

Ghost Joke #6

Did you hear about the ghost who went on safari?
He was a big-game haunter!

Ghost Joke #7

Did you hear about the sick ghost? He had oooooo-ping cough.

Ghost Joke #8

Ghost: Are you coming to my party? Spook: Where is it? Ghost: In the morgue – you know what they say, the morgue the merrier.

Ghost Joke #9

How can you tell if a ghost is about to faint?
He gets pale as a sheet.

Ghost Joke #10

How did the bootician style the ghost’s hair?
With a scare dryer!

Ghost Joke #11

How did the ghost song-and-dance act make a living? By appearing in television spooktaculars.

Ghost Joke #12

How do you get a ghost to lie perfectly flat? You use a spirit level.

Ghost Joke #13

Knock Knock Who’s there !
Boo !
Boo who ?
Just Boo ! I’m a ghost !

Ghost Joke #14

One night, after closing time a barman is sitting at his bar minding his own buisiness, when a spectral hound floats in through the door. The barman, being an exceptionally cool kind of guy, asks “yeah, what do you want?”. The phantom hound explains, in a haunting voice “I’ve lost my tail…… and cannot rest [...]